


Confession

by Rockabelle01



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure, Digimon Adventure Zero Two | Digimon Adventure 02, Digimon Adventure tri.
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-24 12:01:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19723261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rockabelle01/pseuds/Rockabelle01
Summary: There's something going on with Taichi. Everyone's known that for a long time. What they don't know is why he hasn't gone back to normal even after the events with Meicoomon have finished.When Taichi finally reaches out, Yamato knows he has to seize the chance to get to the bottom of things.





	1. Chapter 1

“Hey, want to go get coffee or something?”

Yamato looked over his shoulder. “Since when do you drink coffee?”

Taichi waved a hand impatiently. “Not the point. So? Want to?”

There was band practice later. Yamato had been planning to do homework in the narrow period of time between school and practice. Otherwise, he’d have to stay up late to do it, and he knew he’d be exhausted by then. Practice had become a stressor all on its own.

He turned around completely and took a closer look at his best friend. Taichi’s eyes flitted away, as they had been doing too often of late, hands jamming into his pockets. Yamato frowned.

This could be nothing, or…it could be the break they’d been waiting for all this time. Maybe Taichi was finally going to let him in.

The miasma that had been hanging over his best friend since at least the infected Digimon first started showing up had lessened after the final fight with Meicoomon, but not entirely disappeared. That had not been so concerning, at the time. They had all been through a lot, and Taichi more than most. Taichi had been forced to watch Daigo-sensei sacrifice his life for him. He’d had to shoulder the burden of deciding that Meicoomon had to die. He’d had to weather Hikari’s anger. It was understandable that he’d be depressed for a while.

Still, it was clear that he’d broken through whatever had been holding him back before, and that had seemed like enough. His smile had seemed close to normal, if infrequent, for a short time.

But as the weeks passed, the distance between the rest of the chosen children and their leader hadn’t really closed. He was still holding himself back from them. He still isolated himself, he still pushed himself to act cheerful when he was around them, he still changed subjects when anyone tried to ask him what was wrong.

Yamato had felt too wrung out himself after everything to do more than give Taichi the eye occasionally, letting him know that there was at least one person not buying his bullshit.

Taichi reaching out on his own was…but on the other hand, it was probably stupid to get any hopes up. The last several times Taichi had acted like maybe he was ready to talk, they’d just wound up sitting in silence or reminiscing about old times.

Yamato sighed, resigning himself to a late night.

“Yeah, alright.”

A little while later, they were sequestered in the back-corner booth of a quiet coffee shop. Yamato watched Taichi stare out the window and took a long, pointed slurp of his coffee. The other boy glanced at him and Yamato raised a brow.

“So? Was there something you wanted to talk about?”

The brunette fiddled with his hands, not saying anything.

Irritation sparked.

“What, so you just dragged me out here for nothing? You know I have better things to do than just sit here, right?”

“Wow, sorry it’s such a waste of your oh-so-valuable time to hang out with me,” Taichi snapped. “If you didn’t want to come, you could’ve just said so.”

“It wouldn’t _be_ a waste if you would just stop dithering. There’s something going on with you, there has been for months now, and you want to tell me, finally. Right?”

Taichi hunched. Yamato groaned, running a hand through his hair, and tried to rein in his temper.

It hurt to see his friend suffering. Being unable to do anything about it was a special kind of torture that was driving him insane. He’d tried to be patient because, after all, getting angry that Taichi was too stubborn to share his feelings and ask for help would be pretty hypocritical, coming from him.

That was the point, though, right? They were supposed to have moved beyond all that with each other. Maybe Taichi felt like he had to keep up a strong front for the others, but Yamato was supposed to be the exception. They’d seen each other at their worst. It felt like a stab in the heart that Taichi refused to trust him.

Yamato closed his eyes and made himself breathe deeply. Then he leaned over the table and placed his hand over his friend’s.

“It’s me, okay? You can tell me. I won’t tell the others if you don’t want me to.” He tried to lighten his tone. “Whatever you’re worrying about, don’t. It’s impossible for my opinion of you to get any lower, anyway.”

“There’s been some stuff I’ve had to figure out,” Taichi said slowly. “It’s taken me a while, and I’m still not really…I mean. I don’t know how to do this, Yamato. I don’t know if talking about it is even the right thing.”

This was definite progress. Taichi was admitting there was something to talk about _._

“Have you talked to Agumon,” Yamato asked, struggling to keep his tone casual.

His friend sighed. “Agumon can’t really help. There are some human things that Digimon just don’t have a frame of reference for.”

Carefully, Yamato squeezed Taichi’s hand where it still lay on the table under his. “I’m your partner, too, aren’t I? Talk to me. It won’t hurt anything.”

“Won’t it,” Taichi said hoarsely.

Yamato’s heartbeat echoed in his ears. Whatever this was, it was bigger than he’d thought. Obviously, it would have to be serious to have caused his friend so much upheaval, but Taichi was genuinely scaring him. Worst-case scenarios flashed through his head: _I’m addicted to drugs, I knocked up a girl, I’m sick, I’m dropping out of school to pursue a life of crime…_ maybe not that last one.

“Taichi, look at me,” he said.

He waited until deep brown eyes finally locked with his. He clenched his fingers around his friend’s again, hard. “No,” he promised. “It won’t.”

Taichi searched his expression.

In the silence, Yamato noticed for the first time that it had started raining. The drumming of the downpour was loud in the space between them.

The reflection of the raindrops trailing down the window drew flickering lines of light and shadow over Taichi’s face like a veil of tears.

“I’m gay.”


	2. Chapter 2

Yamato’s body reacted before his mind had fully processed the words, his hand jolting back from Taichi’s in surprise.

He regretted the action immediately. It felt like it would be too weird to put his hand back, though.

He shifted in his seat, trying to think.

“Are you sure?”

Taichi’s face was usually so expressive, but he couldn’t read it now. All he knew was that his friend was barely breathing, and every word out of Yamato’s mouth was making it worse.

“I mean, you said you were figuring things out, so…have you finished? Or are you still, uh. Is it possible that you’re just confused?”

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Taichi said like he was trying to enunciate each word very clearly.

“Alright. Okay.” He leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms. “Does anyone else know?”

“You’re the first I’ve told.”

“Not even Hikari?”

Taichi’s mouth twisted. “She wouldn’t want to hear from me right now.”

The sad thing was that was probably true. Hikari was still Hikari, so it was not as though she was acting petulant or hostile. There was just an absence of something that had been there, invisible and warm in the air between her and her brother.

Yamato was so used to the way the two of them were around each other that he hadn’t noticed it until it was gone. They had always been so tuned into each other. They always seemed to be aware of what the other was doing when they were in the same physical space, like they kept an ear out for a note no one else could hear. It wasn’t like they orbited around each other, but there was a harmony to the way they moved.

There was something discordant about them, now. It was probably hardly noticeable to most people, but to the original Chosen Children, it was painfully obvious. And Hikari wouldn’t allow anyone to address it. For as different as their personalities were, sometimes it was so obvious that she and Taichi were related.

Yamato could not believe that a closeness like theirs could be gone for good. They cared too much for each other, and there was an injustice to Hikari’s anger that he believed she was too good to let fester forever.

Would she turn away from her brother when he needed her? It pained Yamato that he couldn’t say ‘no’ for certain.

Taichi had spent the last few weeks not meeting Yamato’s eyes, and now he wouldn’t stop.

“There’s an underclassman,” Taichi said, like he was answering a question Yamato hadn’t asked. “Some of his classmates found gay porn on his phone. They’ve been hassling him and spreading rumors.”

Yamato had a sinking feeling he knew where this was going.

“So you want to, what? Come out and take some of the heat off him?”

“Not exactly. Or that’s not the only reason.” His leader bit his lip. “I’ve spoken up before- told people to knock it off. But it doesn’t feel like enough. The stuff they’re saying about this guy- it’s not true. They definitely would know that stuff wasn’t true about me, so if they knew that I was gay, too, then maybe it would change the assumptions they’re making about him.”

“Or maybe they’d just harass you, too,” Yamato hissed.

“They could try.” Taichi’s jaw set.

“Are you really thinking this through? This is the kind of thing that could ruin your life if it gets out. It could make it hard for you to get jobs, get accepted into schools, even get housing. It could follow you for the rest of your life.”

Yamato slapped a hand on the table. “Do you even know what it’s like to be an outcast? As long as I’ve known you, you’ve been popular. You’re a star athlete and you’ve got a way with people. You draw in friends like moths to a flame. I’ve always,” he swallowed. “Kind of envied that about you. Sometimes I’ve thought that you should be the one with the Crest of Friendship.”

Taichi said nothing, lips parting with surprise.

“The point is that if this gets out, that could all change. It won’t matter what kind of person you are, all anyone will see is a preconception. Something to look down on. Maybe even to fear. You don’t fit the stereotype, Taichi, but people could still imagine that you do.”

This was all going wrong. Yamato hadn’t meant to say any of this, didn’t even know where it was coming from, but it was true, wasn’t it? He had to make Taichi understand that this- this whim he was having, this stupidly brave desire to protect someone else based on a confused feeling that might not even be more than a phase, this could seriously harm him. Taichi was supposed to be more mature than this, now.

It just figured that Taichi would hesitate when he should have charged forward during their battles and then rediscover his reckless attitude the minute that behavior was no longer useful. Damn him.

The worst part was that Yamato knew he was saying exactly the wrong things to get him to stop. A familiar light was growing in Taichi’s eyes that thrilled Yamato even as it frustrated him. He’d missed it so much; thought for a time that it might be gone for good.

Taichi, who had seemed almost like a stranger at times over the last few months, looked more and more like himself with every passing second. The quiet, nervous person from earlier who could barely confess what he felt was gone. Taichi sat up straight in his seat, head raised and shoulders back.

“I can’t go through life hiding,” he said. “That’s not who I am. You think I’ve never felt alone or hated? I’ve never faced others’ fear? You should know better than that!” It was almost a shout.

Yamato thought of everything they’d been through together, in both worlds, and couldn’t refute that.

Taichi continued, eyes burning. “I can handle opposition and hardship, okay? But I can’t survive losing myself. If I sit silently by, if I just deny an entire side of myself, my life, that is what will happen. I know it, I’ve known it for a while, but I’ve been too afraid to do anything about it. I’m done with that.”

Both of them were breathing hard, like they’d been trading physical blows.

“I need to know, Yamato. Can I count on you? _Are you on my side?_ ”

“I think this is one of the stupidest ideas you’ve ever had,” Yamato snarled. “And that’s saying something. Of course I’m on your side, you fucking idiot. Like I’d leave you over something like this.”

The grin that lit Taichi’s face shone like the sun and Yamato felt like he hadn’t seen it in a thousand years. His chest ached as he grinned back.

“Then I guess I know what I need to do.”

“What?” Yamato asked, alarmed.

“I’ll tell my family. Tonight.”

“That soon?”

“Better to get it over with, right? I’ve waited long enough.”

Everything was happening so quickly. Yamato rested his elbows on the table and pressed his hands together in front of his mouth, thinking.

“Tell them at dinner. I have band practice after that. I can stop at your place on the way. If it goes badly, come with me to my practice and take your books. Say that you’re going to do homework with me. If all goes well, then just tell me that you don’t need help with your homework after all.”

“You never let any of us go to your practices. You even make Takeru sit outside, sometimes. ‘Too distracting to the creative process,’ wasn’t it?”

Yamato glared over his fingers. “If you think I’m going to leave you alone tonight if your family reacts badly, you can go to hell. Even if everything goes well, if you want some company, then you come with me. No bullshit trying to shoulder things alone. Promise me.”

“Alright. I promise,” Taichi said softly.

“I’m trusting you on this,” Yamato warned.

“I know. No bullshit.”

They exchanged a look; Taichi’s warm, Yamato’s faintly embarrassed.

“That’s settled, then.” Yamato cleared his throat. “I need to get going. Some of us actually have to cook for ourselves, you know.” He paused. “Unless you want me to be there with you when you tell them?”

Taichi thought about it, but shook his head. “Thanks, but it’d be better with just the family, I think.”

“What do you think Hikari will do?”

His friend’s brows drew together painfully. “I wish I knew.”

They were silent. Then Taichi stood up and fumbled in his pocket for his wallet.

“I can get it,” Yamato protested.

“No way. It’s the least I can do. Thanks for, well. For listening.” Taichi rubbed his nose. “I really appreciate your support, you know?”

“Yeah, well. It’s not like there’s any stopping you when you get like this,” Yamato said gruffly.

Taichi flashed a small smile and Yamato felt like he should have to blink spots out of his vision. Had it really been so long since he’d seen Taichi smile genuinely that he’d forgotten how intense it could be? It was like he’d built up a callous, like the ones on his fingers from playing guitar, and it had faded from lack of practice. With just a couple plucks of his heartstrings, he was left sore and stinging.

“Wish me luck.”

“Good luck.”

As Taichi dashed away from the shop door through the rain, hair soaked through and starting to droop down more like a normal person’s within moments, Yamato thought of a prayer his grandmother had taught him.

He murmured, “May those frightened cease to be afraid, and may those bound be free. May the powerless find power, and may people think of one another. May those who find themselves in trackless, fearful wilderness–the children, the aged, the unprotected–be guarded by beneficent celestials, and may they swiftly attain enlightenment.”

He smiled to himself. He was not really a spiritual person, but that prayer had always stuck in his mind. The “trackless, fearful wilderness” made him think of the Digital World, and the “beneficent celestials” reminded him of their partner digimon.

Now, he could only hope that whatever beneficent divine presence there might exist in this world would breathe protection over his best friend. He couldn’t think of anyone more deserving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That is a real Buddhist prayer. Slightly paraphrased, but you can't blame Yamato for not remembering it word-for-word.

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when you watch Digimon Tri too close to reading the manga "Our Dreams At Dusk."
> 
> Please keep in mind that this story is set in Japan. The atmosphere surrounding lgbt issues is not the same as it is in the USA, for instance. Japan is quite a conservative country, in many ways, and this is one of them.


End file.
